Avoiding passions

Does anyone else avoid their passions because it stresses them out? Whenever I'm a big fan of something or passionate about a topic, I tend to shy away from indulging in it further.

Like, my favorite band is fall out boy and as much as I want to know everything about them, I can't bring myself to. I avoid watching interviews, discussions with others, backstories- it makes me really uncomfortable. I feel like an imposter and I don't deserve to indulge in that interest. I have to be in a REALLY good mood to dive into things I like. I've a passion for linguistics, but I can't associate myself with it. Whenever I think about really getting into it I just get sick to my stomach. When it comes to my mental health, I can't reach out because I feel weird about it being a part of me. Hell it took me awhile to actually post here. It doesn't help when I already feel like I don't know what I actually like, because when I do like something, I have to get away.