Players keep Cancelling and it’s starting to break my will as a DM

Edit: Hey, this comment section really cheered me up. Thanks guys! I think this will really help! It was really nice to be so assured that my frustration is natural!

I’m relatively new to DnD, so I gotta ask- how do you guys actually get a group together? It feels nearly impossible for me. IRL or otherwise, I cannot seem to get a grip of how to get everyone to just SHOW UP

Every-time I’ve tried to be a player or DM, the game gets cancelled. I have social anxiety, and I absolutely do understand that sometimes you just need to ghost or be on your own but I have zero idea what to do at this point. Do I just have to invite 20 people to the game and hope at least 5 show up? Do I just stop trying to planning all together because it’s nigh impossible to predict who will reliably show?

I hate to say this, but the sessions in which I do zero prep and have zero expectations have reliably been the funnest games and it makes me sad. I love prep, but I never get to do it and show off all the cool ideas I have because people don’t show! I MADE PHYSICAL PROPS FOR MY CAMPAIGN THAT PEOPLE DIDN’T SHOW UP TOO! THE HEARTBREAK KILLS ME EVERY TIME I LOOK AT IT!!! And they were all super into it and we put a bunch of effort into it. I just want a group of people to be a table man.

I tried in person for almost 4 months to get a group together and they just kept cancelling like a day or 2 before. It was like the 3rd time of them cancelling so I just kinda gave up.

Now I’ve started looking online AND AHSHDBEUEEBEH pleasE HELP!!! People keep adding me and then deciding not to show either hours after sending in thier sheet or just not show up and not tell me why.

I’m not mad these people, I get the social anxiety, I totally do. I don’t know what’s going on in your life. I got into this hobby to try and make friends and I actually feel LONELIER now that I constantly have to be like “sorry guys, I guess half of the part just couldn’t make it tonight.” It’s just getting bad. I have finally gotten to a point where 2 people are showing up online, I’m lucky to have them. Should I just be happy with that and move on? I don’t know what to do.